Funny Quotes About Christmas Day 2019

Funny Quotes About Christmas Day 2019

Funny Quotes About Christmas Day: Seasonal joy? Ideal here. These Funny Quotes About Christmas Day will laugh you up and cheer your glass. Interesting citations and free clean jokes for every one of the merriment’s. Enjoy! If you are intending to send Funny Quotes About Christmas Day to your loved ones on up and coming Xmas. At that point, we propose you set up a card with Funny Quotes About Christmas Day.

Funny Quotes About Christmas Day

Hardly any entertaining Funny Quotes About Christmas Day will be ensured to make your loved one’s grin. We as a whole have gone over some decent entertaining Christmas idioms that have been utilized again and again. Here is another rundown of Funny Quotes About Christmas Day that isn’t just amusing yet in addition worth sharing. Gracious am sad, I didn’t see you are a specialist on how I ought to carry on Christmas! If it’s not too much trouble proceed while I take the notes. Many banks have a new kind of Christmas club in operation.

Funny Quotes About Christmas Day

  • Zen Christmas: the gift of nothingness.
  • Why is Christmas like a day at the office?
    Because you do all the work, and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.
  • Aren’t we forgetting the true meaning of this day – the birth of Santa?
    – Bart Simpson (Matt Groening)
  • How is the Italian version of Christmas different?
    One Jesus, one Mary, and 33 wise guys.
  • The amount of time and energy we spend putting up and taking down holiday decorations tells me our ‘top of the food chain’ claim is invalid.
    – Linda in Disguise ‏@LindaInDisguise

Funny Quotes About Christmas Day

  • The office Christmas party is a great opportunity to catch up with people you haven’t seen for twenty minutes.
    – Julius Sharpe ‏@juliussharpe
  • Never worry about the size of your Christmas tree. In the eyes of children, they are all 30 feet tall.
    – Larry Wilde
  • Nothing’s as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas.
    – Kin Hubbard
  • There are 17 more shopping days until Christmas. So, guys, that means 16 more days till we start shopping, right?
    – Conan O’Brien
  • If you watch a lot of infomercials, there’s a good chance you’ll already know how to work any gift you get from me.
    – Just Bill ‏@WilliamAder

Funny Quotes About Christmas Day

  • In the birth of Jesus story,
    One thing we’re never told:
    What happened to the frankincense
    And myrrh, and all that gold?
    – Greg Tamblyn
  • “Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.”
  • “I haven’t taken my Christmas lights down. They look so nice on the pumpkin.”
  • “This holiday season, no matter what your religion is, please take a moment to reflect on why it’s better than all the other ones.”
Funny Quotes About Christmas Day
Funny Quotes About Christmas Day
  • “The principal advantage of the non-parental lifestyle is that on Christmas Eve you need not to be struck dumb by the three most terrifying words that the government allows to be printed on any product: “Some assembly required.”

Short Funny Quotes About Christmas Day

  • “I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store, and he asked for my autograph.”
  • This Christmas season, regardless of what your religion is, it would be ideal if you pause for a minute to think about why it’s superior to the various ones
  • The vital favorable position of the non-parental way of life is that on Christmas Eve you require not be struck imbecilic by the three most alarming words that the administration permits to be imprinted on any item: “Some gathering required.

Funny Quotes About Christmas Day

  • “Adults can take a simple holiday for Children and screw it up. What began as a presentation of simple gifts to delight and surprise children around the Christmas tree has culminated in a woman unwrapping six shrimp forks from her dog, who drew her name.”
  • “A lovely thing about Christmas is that it’s compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.”
  • “That’s the true spirit of Christmas; people being helped by people other than me.”
  • “Do give books – religious or otherwise – for Christmas. They’re never fattening, seldom sinful, and permanently personal.”
  • “For Christmas this year, try giving less. Start with less attitude. There’s more than enough of that in the world as it is – and people will usually just give it back anyway!”
  • I loathe the radio this season since they play “All I Want For Christmas Is You” like, each other tune. Also, that is sufficiently not.
  • Grown-ups can take a straightforward occasion for Children and mess it up. What started as an introduction of basic presents to pleasure and astonishment youngsters around the Christmas tree has finished in a lady unwrapping six shrimp forks from her pooch, who drew her name.
  • “Aren’t we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas. You know, the birth of Santa?”
  • “Let me see if I’ve got this Santa business straight. You say he wears a beard, has no discernible source of income and flies to cities all over the world under cover of darkness? You sure this guy isn’t laundering illegal drug money?”

Funny Quotes About Christmas Day

  • “Santa Claus wears a Red Suit, he must be a communist. And a beard and long hair must be a pacifist. What’s in that pipe that he’s smoking?”
  • “Christmas is a time when kids tell Santa what they want and adults pay for it. Deficits are when adults tell the government what they want and their kids pay for it.”

Funny Quotes About Christmas Day For Friends

  • Dear Santa, This year, please give me a fat bank account and a slim body. And please don’t mix those two up like you did last year. Thanks.
  • “If you see a sign that says ‘Peep Show’, that doesn’t mean they’re letting you look at presents before Christmas.” – Father Christmas in Elf
  • “Damn. How can you give Kris Kringle a parking ticket on Christmas Eve? What’s next, rabies shots for the Easter Bunny?” – Santa Claus in Home Alone
  • “Aren’t we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa” – Bart Simpson

Funny Quotes About Christmas Day For Friends

  • “Cancel the kitchen scraps for lepers and orphans. No more merciful beheadings. And call off Christmas!” – Sheriff George of Nottingham
  • “Christmas shopping. Never an easy or pleasant task.” – Harry (Love Actually)
  • “Blast this Christmas music. It’s joyful and triumphant.” – The Grinch (How the Grinch Stole Christmas)
  • Christmas: the only time of year you can sit in front of a dead tree eating candy out of socks.
    Anonymous
  • Christmas is a time when everybody wants his past forgotten and his present remembered.
    Phyllis Diller

Funny Quotes About Christmas Day For Friends

  • One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas day. Don’t clean it up too quickly.
    Andy Rooney
  • Never worry about the size of your Christmas tree. In the eyes of children, they are all 30 feet tall.
    Larry Wilde
  • Let’s be naughty and save Santa the trip.
    Gary Allan
  • Santa Claus has the right idea – visit people only once a year.
    Victor Borge
  • Nothing’s as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas.
    Kin Hubbard
  • A lovely thing about Christmas is that it’s compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.
    Garrison Keillor
  • I’m dreaming of a white Christmas. But if the white runs out I’ll drink the red.
    Anonymous
  • Three Wise Women would have asked directions, arrived on time, helped deliver the baby, bought practical gifts, cleaned the stable, made a casserole, and there would be peace on earth!
    Anonymous

Funny Quotes About Christmas Day For Friends

  • Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.
    Dave Barry
  • Some people are born for Halloween, and some are just counting the days until Christmas.
    Stephen Graham Jones
  • Christmas Eve, a perfect night to express affection for your family, to forgive those who failed you, and to forget past mistakes.
    Unknown
  • The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other.
    Burton Hillis
  • Probably the reason we all go so haywire at Christmas time with the endless unrestrained and often silly buying of gifts is that we don’t quite know how to put our love into words.
    Harlan Miller

Funny Merry Christmas Sayings

  • Do give books – religious or otherwise – for Christmas. They’re never fattening, seldom sinful, and permanently personal.
    Lenore Hershey
  • A dazzling thing about Christmas is that it’s mandatory, similar to a tempest, and we as a whole experience it together.”
  • “I cherish Christmas. I get a lot of brilliant presents I can hardly wait to trade.”
  • “That is the genuine soul of Christmas; individuals being helped by individuals other than me.”
  • “Do give books – religious or something else – for Christmas. They’re never swelling, occasional evil, and forever close to home.”

  • From home to home, and heart to heart, from one place to another. The warmth and joy of Christmas bring us closer to each other.
    Emily Matthews
  • At Christmas, all roads lead home.
    Marjorie Holmes
  • Christmas is a time when you get homesick – even when you’re home.
    Carol Nelson
  • For Christmas this year, have a go at giving less. Begin with less disposition. There’s all that could possibly be needed of that on the planet as it is – and individuals will typically simply give it back at any rate!”
  • “I quit trusting in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a retail establishment, and he requested my signature.”
  • “Aren’t we overlooking the genuine significance of Christmas. You know, the introduction of Santa?”

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